This may not be to the point. First of all my experience is mostly with pets not Jack Daniels flag America shirt. This is the thing: I had to really pay attention to the behavior I wanted over the things I did not like. IT is deceptively difficult to develop this change in perspective. It required actively paying attention to my own behavior. Good behavior is easy to overlook. Bad behavior can ramp up until we have to pay attention. That is often the point of the behavior. Some examples. I had one dog who loved to lick me. Unfortunately, her tongue was rough, more like a cat’s tongue than most dogs.
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I remember thinking that if allowed: she might lick me until I Jack Daniels flag America shirt. I came to realized that, as the third dog in the pack she was desperate for attention. One day when she was not doing anything in particular, I grabbed her and really hugged and loved her up. I snuggled her so much she almost staggered when I let her go. She was clearly confused. She must have wondered “What was that for? What did I do?” After that: I made a very deliberate and conscious effort to give her attention when she was just hanging out and being calm. Eventually you could not even get her to lick you. Not because I had punished what I did not like. Because I had rewarded the behavior I wanted. The reward was the attention she craved. Either way she was going to get my attention.